Dusting off the old blog...

NSFW.

Thanks to my lovely, caring, thoughtful niece, as well as my stellar immune system, I spent the better half of this work week at home, cuddling the pooch, on a liquid diet, and watching trashy reality TV.  I went to bed with a sore throat Sunday night thinking that a long weekend of wedding festivities had its way with me.  I woke up with an even worse throat, and on the drive in to work I found quite a few itchy/painful/red blisters on my hands and feet.  It was then I realized that my sweet, innocent niece diseased me.  When I babysat her during AK day, Ry was recovering from Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease and was not supposed to be contagious.  Apparently I am some kind of freak of nature, because adults rarely get inflicted with this disease.  No one else that had Ry that week was inflicted or even showed a trace of a dot. 

I literally got in to work, sent my boss an email to tell her I was going to the doctor, and was on my way.  There is nothing like driving in an hour and 15 min to work, writing an email, and turning around driving back home.  I went to the doctor, who confirmed my previously self-diagnosed HFM. Due to my medical history and lymph nodes swelling up like golf balls, she put me on a z-pak just in case.  There is no treatment for HFM except for over-the-counter pain meds and lots of ice cream.  The worst part of HFM was the M.  It is not nice to have blisters all over your throat and have your tongue feel like you just drank a scalding cup of coffee.  

We know where Dottie gets her Dots from

Oh, sorry. Viewer beware. Blister errwhere. That was after some healing.

Blotchy blotches and heyyy bling bling heyyy.

Pros/Cons, you ask?  Sure.

Pros:

• Doc recommended a liquid diet... not sure why... but, what a great way to start a wedding diet! Only 402 days to go!
• I scream, you scream, we all scream for ICE CREAM
• Dottie is the best cuddle bug ever
• I finally Caught up with the Kardashians and all the other TV shows I don’t stay up late enough to watch on live TV
• Worked from home on Wednesday with my feet up watching HGTV

Poochie cuddles <3

Cons:

• Super uncomfortable.  The M was the worst but the H/F spots were itchy and when I itched them, they felt like needles poking in to me
• The Z-Pak, along with my normal movements, coupled side effects from HFM made for a lot of trips to the throne.  Good thing all my wedding books and magazines are in the downstairs bathroom.
• I had to take off all my jewelry, including my engagement ring, which made me feel naked.
• I love making out.  Per doctor’s orders, I was not allowed to make out with Nate... Or exchange saliva with anyone for that matter.

Who wouldn't want to have a piece of this stud? mmmmm.

I went back to the doctor yesterday to get the A-Ok to go back to work.  She said my hands/feet are good to go, but not to share my spit or mucous with anyone. Okay doc, will do.  The only downside

This morning on my ride in, I had to stop at DD’s.  Not for a coffee, as I had already brewed my DD at home, but to go to the BR.  Side effects are still lingering.  I think Ry and my HFM called WROR this morning and dedicated a song to me, because this was playing as I was pulling in to the garage at work:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tJYN-eG1zk

Woof, Queen, woof. 

Until next time,

KB

AK Day-- A guest blog by Lil Miss Ry

AK Day.  Last Friday, Auntie Kacey (a.k.a AK) babysat me all day.  It may have been the longest day of my very short life thus far.  One of my favorite things to say is “uh-oh” and uh-oh is right.  I was so looking forward to some adventures, because I know AK is the “fun aunt”, but before mom and dad left, they gave her a list of all the things we couldn’t do.  We had to reschedule our whole day.  We had to cancel our nail and ear piercing appointments, and we had to call all our friends and tell them we couldn’t do a tequila tasting lunch at “The Plant” anymore.  It was so embarrassing! Can you say helicopter parents? Gawd.

Needless to say, the day got off to a rough start with a whole lot of uh-ohs. 

 

AK started the day off with trying to feed me breakfast.  I finished up a yogurt and saw AK cutting up some cantaloupe when I realized that I wasn’t going to get pancakes and bacon and eggs and chocolate for breakfast, which is what I deserve on AK Day.  I actually deserve it every day because I am so cute and well behaved, but mom and dad think I should be healthy.  AK just assumed I would eat that orange fruit crap she put on my tray, but I showed her who was boss.

I won.  AK was worried that I didn’t have enough to eat, so she made arrangements to meet up with Grandma so I could have some good eats.  Before we headed to G’s house, I made my slave babysitter change me. Before I get dressed in the morning I like to play for a few minutes with my friend Violet. We have so much in common.

AK unzipped my jammies and went to the closet to see what I had for outfits.  She couldn’t believe the amount of clothes I have in my closet.  But, like, hi, I can only wear outfits once before they go out of style.  I am so high fashion.

She was boring me while picking out clothes and even though she didn’t finish taking off my jammies, I was okay to move around.  AK left the closet door open, which is where my mom and dad hide my toy box... Jackpot! 

Then I tried to run away, but AK caught me.

She took off my jammies, changed my diaper, and while her back was turned for one minute, I made a break for da crib.  For some reason my old, mean parents only let me have my pacis when I am sleeping, but I found a way to help myself to happiness.  HA, you can’t keep my pacis in jail, guys!

AK took the paci immediately out of my mouth and threw it back in the crib, beer pong style.  She successfully changed me while I tried to wrangle out of her ginger grip.  I have to give her some credit, I am not easy to keep still nowadays.  There is a whole world of possibilities to explore—why stay still on the carpet in my bedroom?  Of all the outfits in my closet, this is what AK picked: a “My Auntie Loves Me” shirt... Crocs... Gosh.  Come on, Uncle Nate, control that woman!  Well actually, UN, now that I think about it, I don’t have any “My Uncle Loves Me” shirts.  AK has points on you, homie.

Crocs are actually pretty cool!  They make a really fun sound when I bang them together!  Oh AK, you smart woman!  You are brilliant! 

 

 Oh, hair dresser time! Check out my sweet bow.  AK does some great work, but she isn’t always gentle.  She kept saying “you have to suffer to be beautiful”, which is something Great Gram always used to say to her when she did her hair!

 Can I grab a paci for the road? Mom usually lets me. No luck with AK.

 Oh Jay Bear! I love him! He is my favorite EVER! AK and UN got me him at Jay Peak, where they are getting married next September!  I am so excited! I am going to wear sparkles and 6 inch heels! I want to bring him everywhere with me, but sometimes mom and dad forget he is my favorite and he stays sitting by my Pampers stash. So sad!

  AK put on some of the best jams on the drive over to Grandma’s house... Pandora Toddler radio.  I actually think she liked it more than me.  She knew every song and was singing and rocking out so hard, I don’t think it was safe.  Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog!  When we got to Grandma’s, I was stahvin’ like Mahvin.  Naturally, Grandma had butter with toast waiting for me to nibble on!  Yum, it was so good!

 Look at my Crocs! I still love them! lThey are so cute!  AK and UN wear them all the time, I want to be just like them!

 I gave a nice little show to the crowd that gathered to watch me eat my butter... Apparently adults love watching me play peek-a-boo with my bib? So weird. They kept clapping and saying “Yay Ryann”.  I gotta give my fans a good show!

After my peek-a-boo escapades, I made my way to GG’s for some band and ball.  GG was quite the athlete in her day, so I like tossing the ball back and forth with her.  I also like eating the ball, but GG doesn’t like that and takes it away from me.

Then AK came barging in talking about taking a trip to the mall.  Shopping?! I love shopping!  I hope Macy’s is having a good sale!  We got to the mall and AK and G went straight to the household appliances, and I knew it was time to “nap”.  How dare they shop for such boring things like coffee pots with automatic shut off.  Then they were perusing through AK’s wedding registry! I pretended to sleep the whole time because I was so embarrassed.  Don’t they know I was with them and needed treats? 

 Oh... here is the baby section! Finally guys! Thanks! It was time to leave when I started dropping Jay Bear out of the carriage screaming "UHOH"!

 After the mall, we headed home for lunch.  Kraft mac-n-cheese!  Loves it!

 After a hearty meal, I sat down to catch up on some emails with Uncle Bob (a.k.a. The Claw).  Didn’t have much in my inbox, so I played some Tetris and checked my FAcebook.

  I didn’t have any new notifications, so I figured it would be a good time to n-a-p. Just in case there was an earthquake in Massachusetts, I held on for dear life.  You never know! Better to be safe than sorry!

 

Hi guys! I am up!

 This woman will not stop taking pics.  I refused to cooperate.

 Oh... you didn't tell me you had sunglasses, AK.  I love them.  I can cooperate now! How sassy and cool am i?!  I got Jay Bear and sweet Target shades and crocs and an Auntie shirt?!

Overall, it was a great day!  It started out rough.  I just wanted to make sure AK knew who the boss was.  I can't wait to have another AK day soon!  Maybe sometime soon AK and UN can take me for dinner or something super fun!  Maybe UN will get me an uncle shirt?! Maybe next time my mom and dad won't make so many stupid rules... Can't a girl just have some Patron and get some tats?!

Dottie's Diary - Mad at Mum

Dear Diary,

I am so exhausted from such a long day yesterday.  Dad dragged me out of bed to make poops-n-puddles before I was even ready.  I always call the shots around this town.  If I want to get up, I do.  And you will know it.  I will walk up and down your entire body, lick your face (sometimes in your ears), lift your head off the pillow by burrowing under it, or I just jump out of bed and howl like a beagle.  Those usually work. But, if they don't, I just hop on in to the clean laundry pile and puddle there.  I don't love the reaction from Mom/Dad when I do that, so I try to save the posh puddles for emergencies only. 

After Dad woke me up, I zombied down the stairs, through the living room, right past the bones in the kitchen, down the back stairs, and off the deck.  I did my business, hoping I could resume my morning cuddle with Dad. Unfortunately, other plans were made on my behalf, and I was shooed into Uncle Kieran's room for morning cuddles with him.  I hoped by making my sniff rounds in his room he would get up and play with me, but he didn't.  I decided to be the bigger mammal and give UK a cuddle.

Then… Then… sniff… Uncle Kieran had to leave for work and he put me in my crate.  They try to make it sound fancy nice by calling it "Dottie's House" or "Dottie's Bed". But its seriously just a metal crate with four walls and a ceiling and floor.  There is a bed and water and a few select toys… but they give those things to hardened criminals and murders in jail.  I know I am a little young to be left alone, even with gates in the kitchen, but, seriously guys? I just want to cuddle and play fetch and eat dog bones and roll over for you all day.  I promise, we will get there.  I felt bad because I barked like crazy when UK left for work because I was pissed I had to make my own fun all day long in "Dottie's House."  I was eagerly waiting for him to get home so we could spend some quality time together like we do every Monday and Wednesday when Dad is at school and Mom is at basketball. 

I heard the back door open, footsteps through the kitchen, living room, and then up the stairs… I thought "Oh here is Uncle Kieran coming to rescue me and play with me and take me for a walk, I am so excited, I cannot even contain it, I am running circles around my crate".  Then the door opened… And Mom walked in.  It was the same feeling you would get if you had Sox/Yanks tickets right behind home plate and the game got rained out.  You still get to have the fun, but just not yet.  Mom whisked me away after I made puddles like a good girl outside, and made me sit in rush hour traffic listening to Adele.  She kept telling me to lay down and go to sleep, but seriously, Mom, what do you think I did in my crate all day?  I didn't get to breathe clean air out the window with my ears in the wind or make window saliva art with my tongue or sniff every inch of the backseat.  So, yeah, I was going to do all of the aforementioned activities and not sleep.

We got to Grandma and Grampa's and I got to terrorize my Auntie Bayleigh.  B is a large moose-like chocolate lab and she does not always have the patience to deal with me.  B was tired after spending the day with my cousin Kipu, so I made sure to hunt for all of the eaten marrow bones and toys I could find and gather them all in the living room to play with.  Mom was calling to activate a credit card and B did not want to play tug-of-war, so I knew I needed to do something that would get their attention so they would play with me.  I chewed right through the telephone cord. Yup, I did. Mom was so mad that she had to repeat all of the million prompts, and I heard words that she yells at Dad for using in front of me.  At least I got her attention.

Then Grampa came home and Mom left for her basketball game.  By the time she came home I was SO ANGRY she left me with Bayleigh and Grampa who would not play with me, that I decided I would refuse to go to sleep.  I whined and barked and ran around Mom's room like a crazy person.  She sent me downstairs to annoy G&G, and they would bring me back up.  Mom would pull me in bed and cuddle me, and just as she was about to fall asleep, I would climb out of the covers, run down her legs, jump off her bed, and howl at her door. I repeated this multiple times.  Finally, by almost 1:00am I had had enough.  I proved my point.  I won.  And, I was tired anyways. I had all day today to sleep in my "house" and she had to go to work.  We were up and on the road to Dad's by 4:40 because he had to work at 6:30.  When we got there, Mom mumbled the whole walk to the house about being tired, so she sent me straight to Dad's room where I joined him in bed for a cuddle. She went straight for the shower and I didn't see her again until she was dressed and ready for work.  Just to make sure I got my point across, I jumped up to say hello and by "accident" I ripped her panty hose with my nails.  I hope she buys some new ones before work today!

She did.  And the cheap ones.

 Wow, that really made me tired.  Good thing I have the whole day to myself to sleep and relax and practice my tricks! Woof woof!

Love,

Dottie Barkwell

PS. Uncle Kieran- I can't wait to play with you and smell you and be a good girl for you tonight! 

Lunch-n-Learn: Confidence

This weekend the Hunnies played in a tournament in our town.  Our first game of the season was Saturday and we were all nervous and excited.  One of the girls raised her hand in our huddle and announced that she had "wicked big butterflies, like butterflies the size of bats."  I wanted to tell her I did too, but in front of eleven, eleven-year-olds... HELL NO. I needed to at least pretend I was confident and strong, or we would all be sitting on the bench with our hands shaking, passing around inhalers because we can't catch our breath and our hearts are racing out of our chests!

As promised, the girls got pre-wrap and ribbon for their hair.  I think that helped calm their nerves a bit, and they looked adorable.

I knew our first game was not going to be easy.  We were up against a team that beat us by 40+ points last year, was undefeated during the season, and played up a grade in the playoffs.  I debated telling the girls about how good the team we were playing was going to be... I didn't want them to get super nervous before the game and start out timid and with an attitude like "we are going to lose no matter what".  But I also toyed with telling them this will be the best team we will play all year and we won't have to play them again because they are in a different division in league play.  

Their team got off to a roaring start and quickly reached ~20 point lead.  Their coach, probably a dad on the team, was one of the poorest sports I have EVER played/coached against.  In the 6th grade, any win with a 10-point difference between the winning team/losing team is BIG. This coach had his team running the court on fast breaks, when most coaches would have had their team slow it down a bit.  Most high school coaches would even do that.  My assistant-coach-fill-in (because our other coach was at a funeral) had some good words with their coach about the situation-- he later apologized. 

By halftime, the score was somewhere around 22-4 (I think).  I decided to tell them at halftime that this was one of the best teams around and it was time to just relax, be aggressive, and focus on one thing each time they went out on the court.  During the second half, my team was SO into game and got so excited over the little things they were achieving... Be it a steal or a shot or a rebound, the girls were cheering and displaying more camaraderie than I could have ever asked for.  When they got a basket... it was like winning the state championship in double overtime.  All they needed was a few little plays and they were into the game.  The Hunnies were smiling and congratulating each other.  

As embarrassing as it is to admit it, the final scoreboard read 30-10 and I did not even realize until hours later that the score keepers stopped putting up the score and the final score was actually 49-10.  I don't know if my girls realized that either. I am hoping we were all just excited to get rid of the nerves and just start playing basketball.

I explained to the team at the beginning of the year that all of the girls would get playing time every game.  At this age, sitting on the bench and not playing = "I am not good. The other girls are better. I don't deserve a chance."  Hopefully the parents understand my philosophy.  The girls will have plenty of time to sit on the bench in AAU/high school.  The team we played against, even though they were up 30+, did not put their second string in until the second half of the second half.  I understand this is a reality for sports teams, but for me, and at this age, it was awful to see.  Even though their team was kicking butt, they were not smiling and it did not look like they were having fun.  If a mistake was made by a player on their team, I watched the girl glance over to the bench and wait for some kind of reprimand from the coach. It was sad.  During a time out late in the game, while the Hunnies were smiling and excited, I told them to look over at the other team-- not one smile.  I told them that I was proud of them.

We went on to win our Sunday game 22-10.  The girls started the game like they finished their game on Saturday-- confident, aggressive, and having fun.  It was so nice seeing the girls succeed and be genuinely happy for their teammates when they made a good play or played good defense.  I think that says a lot more about us as a team than the team we played on Saturday. 

The Hunnies Are Back!

The Hoop Hunnies are back in action! 

Its year two in coaching my town's travel basketball team.  Last year I coached the 5th grade team and this year, I moved up with the team to the 6th grade. Last year was an interesting year as it was a first for us all. It was my first year coaching, their first year playing in a competitive league, and the first year the league had a 5th grade division.  It was definitely a learning year.  We started out in the hole a few games but improved enough to end the season with a winning record and we were the only team in our town to win a playoff game!

This year I went into the season with a better idea of what my goals for the team were because I knew what to expect. My assistant coach C was back and we were pumped to get the season going and see who we would end up with on our team.

Sometimes I forget that the girls are all 11-12 years old and I expect them to act like adults.  Is it too much to ask that I have their undivided attention for the duration of the practice? I think not.  But I also have to keep in mind that they are going to be silly and joke around.  Will it be allowed while C or I are talking? ABSOLUTELY NOT.  The whistle will blow and the girls will run.  Should we allow it on water breaks or down time? Sure, but to an extent.  

This is what my team looks like when I tell them I am not there to babysit them and they need to listen to me. http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/40-strangely-funny-womens-basketball-team-portrait

Tonight I was flying solo and because the hunnies have the day off from school tomorrow, they were extra sassy and not quite as focused as usual.  It was frustrating at the time, but looking back, days off from school were the BOMB. (I think that was a term I used when I was their age). At the end of practice we were gathering to go over some "housekeeping" notes.  

First order of business was to vote on a team name.  I asked the girls last night to think about names to vote on.  We had a wide range of names from the Ballin' Babes to Blue Storm to Blue Thunder.  While I secretly LOVED the Ballin' Babes (last year I referred to the team as the "Hoop Hunnies" because that was a suggestion last year), I let the girls all vote on names.  The Methuen Blue Thunder edged out the Blue Storm by one vote.  Some girls protested and asked for a recount, but I refused.  I know I counted correctly.  

Next, I passed out folders I made the girls with their names on them.  It was like Christmas.  If I knew all it took to get their attention was a manila folder with their name on it, I would have done it at the first practice. In the folder was an 8.5x11 sized paper with a basketball court on it.  Each girl took 5 pennies and I asked that they practice our team plays using the pennies as players. "This is SO cool, I am going to make my mom, dad, and brother all play with me when I get home."  Who said learning can't be fun? I also bribed them telling them that if they did their homework, I would buy a fun colored pre-wrap to use as headbands as well as some ribbon for their hair.  Hey, it promotes camaraderie and unity.

My next task was to have each girl write down a goal and their name for our first game on Saturday.  I want to ask them after the game is over if they reached their goal.  This is the first time I did this, so I didn't know what to expect.  I figured I would get a few "I want to box-out"s and "make my lay-ups".  I definitely got those, but there were two that stood out in my mind.  One girl said she wanted to "score two goals."  I worked a little on basketball terminology, but I guess I need to go a little further.  The other one that stood out wasn't for the goal itself, but instead of the girl writing her name at the top with the goal following, she wrote her goal, and signed it: Love, (and her name).  

As much as I sometimes get caught up in the frustrations of coaching girls, I love it.  I love their humor and their "reality."  I told them I cancelled a very hot date on Friday night so I could get to bed early and be ready for the early morning game.  One girl responded to my "7:00 pm bed time" with a "well, I am going out to dinner with my family and if we are still at the restaurant at 7:00, I will go sleep in the car, I promise."

While we were leaving, one of the girls asked if we could have a nickname for the Blue Thunder.  I was thinking she would try to shorten our team name into B.Thun. or something like that.  She suggested we call ourselves the "Thunder Thighs."  After having myself a good laugh, I kindly explained that it was not a flattering nickname and we might want to consider something else. 

I also gave them each 3 pieces of candy and sent them home. They couldn't believe I let them have more than one.  Is there a rule about candy I should know about?

(semi) Wordless Wednesday!

My two cuties!

Lunchtime RoaRs

Some call them rants. I used to call them rambles. I made the executive decision this very morning to start calling mine "ROARS" for three reasons:


1) ROARS stands for: Ramblings Of A Redhead
2) I am loud and sometimes ROAR my opinions and stories.
3) I was born in the year of the Tiger.
 

ROARRRRRing

So today's ROAR…  All about the thanks I get from doing my civil duty as a resident of my town.

Yesterday I told my boss I would be in later than usual because I wanted to participate in my town's election. I normally get up at 4:53 to get going for work because I HATE sitting in traffic and do my best work in the morning.  It's also nice to be one of the only people in the office. Voting started at 7:00am.  I could have easily slept in until 5:57 and enjoyed an extra hour of sleep.  Naturally, I didn't reset my daily alarm and got up bright and early, only to remember in the shower that I could have climbed back under my heated blanket and cuddled myself back to sleep.  To kill time, I decided to wash my hair, which I was going to forgo this morning because it still looked half decent from yesterday.  I also shaved my legs, and I don't think they were prepared for the activity because they only get special attention like that once a week. 

I was ready for work by 6:15ish after taking the time to give myself a fierce blowout as well as apply my makeup patiently and in full.  Put on the news only to hear that traffic was backed up on the highway for 20+ miles of my commute, something I usually avoid going to work so early.  I painfully waited to leave to go vote and was waiting at the door to be let in at 6:55 sharp.  After voting, they were handing out free coffee coupons to McDonalds.  My thought process in life is "If its free, its for me."  Since I pass a McDonald's on my way to the highway, I decided to stop for some free Joe.  I obviously could not stop there and ordered a hash brown. These little shits are so tasty.  My taste buds LOVED them.  Forty minutes later, my stomach HATED them. Had to pull out of stopped, bumper-to-bumper traffic only 3/4 into my commute to take care of some awful business. Woof.

After making it back on to the highway ten minutes later, I drive the rest of the way to my T stop only to find out that their parking lot is full.  By the time I could have made it to park at work, I would not have made the $19 "early bird special".  $19 is no parking special.  Its ridiculous.  But, that’s city parking for you. Sucks my $5.50 parking at the T was full.

Decided to just park at the man's place and walk to the bus.  It added an extra 30+ minutes to my commute, but parking was free… and if it's free… its for me!  I stopped in and saw Dottie who went bonkers when she saw me and the panty hose she ripped last week yet I refuse to pay $8.00 for new ones so the ripped ones will remain worn until further notice.  Anytime someone questions the rip, I just say, "Ugh, I just got them caught under my desk. So annoying. I'll have to pick some up at lunch."  Luckily as I was leaving to walk to the bus my man's roommate and his lady were leaving and offered a ride to the stop. Score. Apparently it was a win for the man too because I caught him cheering in the kitchen upon my announcement that I was hitting the road. Typical.  See if I get you anything nice for Christmas.

Rockin' the rip

Back in Action

Time to dust off the old blog!  I don't know why I don't blog more often... There are so many times during the day when I think "OMG this would be a PERFECT ramble blog topic." Between public transportation and my basketball team and my puppy and my niece and my manfriend and my life... I could be blogging 10x a day. 

So where does one just pick up blogging? Who knows.  A summary of the past few months? How about a summary in pictures? My sister told me she only used to look at the pictures in my blog, so thats what she will get--a picture for whats new.

I got a FIERCE tattoo. 

Sailed away into the sunset for a romantic vacation with my man to Block Island

Ruined first half of romantic getaway with irresponsible sunburn from sail to Block Island

Saw a picture of the cutest puppy in the world online, sent it to my man to cheer him up... two weeks later Dottie "Chainsawhands Montgomery" Barkwell arrived from Ohio.

Still the cutest puppy ever... although turning into quite a sassy little lady (like her momma). Here she is telling Dad she does NOT want to go to bed or make poops-n-puddles outside.

Next, in August we welcomed Ryann Elizabeth to the world! This little nugget of joy is my niece and Godchild!

She knows how to make her Auntie Kacey feel good!

She is still trying to figure out what she thinks of Nate...

Went to NYC for a weekend getaway!

Typical Tourist

Turned the BIG two-five and celebrated on Castle Island.  This was a huge birthday because 25 is my favorite number and also one of my top keno numbers to play

Jimmy Fund Walk!

 So many more blogs to come.  Happy November.  Is it really November already?