RIP BigRed

Dear Big Red,

I remember the day we picked you out at Portsmouth Ford. You smelled so new and were so clean, way back during my freshman year of high school. You had some weird smells and were not so clean when I got my hands on your keys when I got my license sophomore year. You brought me everywhere I needed to go, and you loved traveling to and from Storrs, Ct. I hated the way you let me get a speeding ticket on the Pike, but I forgive you for that and try to remember to set my cruise control. I am so sorry that a big, mean, horrible, disgusting, stupid silver SUV pulled out in front of you right after the on ramp at exit 37C, Commerce Way, Woburn. I am sorry that you live in New England and got stuck in the snow, which brought the guard rail into your left head light and driver side door. My mom always told me to make sure I had on clean underwear in case I was ever in an accident, so I made sure to keep you clean in case you were ever in one too. (BrotherBear wanted me to clean you, but SisterBear would have just used SPARES). I love you forever and ever and ever. You were one of the best things since sliced bread.

Love,
Kacey

P.S. You meant so much to me that I named my clown self after you.

My new mode of transportation, with BigRed thriving in the back.